Can you tell from the title? SHTORAY!!! (story for those who can't understand)

Poppledroplik, or the story of the sort of magical nail clippers

Everybody knows what nail clippers are. They're those things that people use to trim nails. Unfortunately, these useful little tools are not used by all. When you look at someone's hideous mutated-looking foot with chipped yellow nails it's pretty obvious that they don't use nail clippers. Either that or they like having feet scary enough to frighten small children.

Poppledroplik was a barber. He wasn't a hair barber though. He was a fear barber. A fear barber, like a hair barber, cuts things. In this case, he cut people's fears away.



Because this was very useful to the community, he made a lot of money. When one gets a lot of money one tends to become greedy and/or selfish. Well, Poppledroplik got grelfish. Yes, grelfish. "What is grelfish?" you ask? Well, think. Greedy + selfish = GRELFISH!

Poppledroplik, though already quite wealthy and prosperous, wanted even MORE money. But how would he achieve this? He decided to visit a wizard for help. The wizard's name was Bogo (no relation to Bogo the seven foot tall green feathered hamster of Pie Dish). Bogo the wizard's real name was actually Farfignuggetpassfogasipica but since having a ten syllable name is rather troublesome he went by Bogo instead. This wizard with the incredibly long name was well known around the town as a very powerful person. But not because he knew magic....

Farfignuggetpassfogasipica(aka Bogo) was a great lover of beans. Beans and broccoli. His continuous consumption of these foods was the source of his magical powers. You see, in his early days at wizard school, Bogo had failed just about every class possible. "You are a bad wizard!" they told him; "You stink! Literally!". Even though all this was true it still made him feel bad. Then one day it happened... after 400 large servings of the special of the day (beans and broccoli) Bogo found his magical talent. With a loud noise (and bad smell) that attracted the attention of everyone in the cafeteria, Bogo transformed into a farzard. And don't ask me what that is, if you can't tell by deduction you don't need to know.

Anyway, Poppledroplik went to Bogo for help because he wanted to get more money. Bogo told him that what he needed were the magical nail clippers of the great Draonillighwooo. Poppledroplik knew this was a lie so he smacked Bogo and told him to tell the truth. Bogo whined that he couldn't take a joke but told him the truth anyway. "What you REALLY need is are the SORT OF magical nail clippers of DRIPPYNOSICUSDUMYHEDICUS" he told him. Poppledroplik then asked how to get these sort of magical nail clippers.



"Well I'd say just ask if you can borrow them" Bogo said. "But be warned... if she's cutting her nails when you come in then the nail clippings will shoot at you like boomerangs and kill you." Poppledroplik thought this sounded dangerous so he paid a broke teenager to do it instead. The teenager came back with the nail clippers several days later. "'kay can I have my money now" he said. Well actually what he said sounded more like "'K kye hve m mney n" but it's more legible the other way.

Poppledroplik rejoiced and had a big party to celebrate. During this party he used the nail clippers to show everyone his great success.... and his nails flew around the room like boomerangs and killed everyone. Including him. But the dog survived and ate all of the food. Then it blew up. And then... the town blew up. And monkeys took over the world. And they ate bananas.

The moral of the story is: You can pay teenagers to do your stuff for you.

lol
Yes, you can pay teenagers to do your stuff for you :)
» lazypuppy on 2006-09-21 06:41:11

40 hours is an entire week of sick time, so it's great!

I've been using it big time with my pregnancy doctor's appointments. I leave an hour early and get paid for it with my sick time (because, you can take that hourly)...If you're really sick, you basically waste your sick time, but they won't fire you...if you're sick for a while, you can get a doctor's note or something. Sometimes, it might even qualify for short term disability if it's something crazy.
» lazypuppy on 2006-09-21 06:43:00

hahah u are so random! ever! ;p
» frostbitten on 2006-09-21 06:49:21

thanks, i felt inspired to change the layout lol

haha those pics are crazy :P
» crochetmama on 2006-09-21 07:20:49

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