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Memores acti prudentes futuri

Surround me
pull me deep beneath your waves
A few words
"When we describe the Moon as dead, we are describing the deadness in ourselves. When we find space so hideously void, we are describing our own unbearable emptiness."
~ D.H. Lawrence

"Is the meaning of life defined by its duration? Or does life have a purpose so large that it doesn't have to be prolonged at any cost to preserve its meaning?"

"Living is not good, but living well. The wise man, therefore, lives as well as he should, not as long as he can... He will always think of life in terms of quality not quantity... Dying early or late is of no relevance, dying well or ill is... even if it is true that while there is life there is hope, life is not to be bought at any cost."
~ Seneca

"People will tell you nothing matters, the whole world's about to end soon anyway. Those people are looking at life the wrong way. I mean, things don't need to last forever to be perfect."
~ Daydream Nation

"All Bette's stories have happy endings. That's because she knows where to stop. She's realized the real problem with stories-- if you keep them going long enough, they always end in death."
~ The Sandman: Preludes & Nocturnes

"The road now stretched across open country, and it occurred to me - not by way of protest, not as a symbol, or anything like that, but merely as a novel experience - that since I had disregarded all laws of humanity, I might as well disregard the rules of traffic. So I crossed to the left side of the highway and checked the feeling, and the feeling was good. It was a pleasant diaphragmal melting, with elements of diffused tactility, all this enhanced by the thought that nothing could be nearer to the elimination of basic physical laws than deliberately driving on the wrong site of the road."
~ Vladimir Nabokov, Lolita

“It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend.”
~ William Blake
Online Radio

More Fun Shtuff
Newgrounds Audio Portal
Kill that boredom!
Binder Paper Comics

Web Comics and Such
A Distant Soil (Some nudity)
The Adventures of Gyno-Star (Some explicit stuff)
Axe Cop
Basic Instructions
Bear Nuts

Blue Milk Special
Camp Weedonwantcha
Cigarro & Cerveja
Conspiracy Friends!
Crunchy Bunches

Curia Regis
Cyanide and Happiness
dead winter (has some explicit stuff)
Devilbear: The Grimoires of Bearalzebub (PG-13?)
Diesel Sweeties
Dumm Comics
Eat That Toast!
Ectopiary (Some nudity)
The End
Evil Diva
Evil Inc.
Existential Comics
The Fancy Adventures of Jack Cannon
For Lack of a Better Comic
Forming (Explicit)

Girls with Slingshots (some explicit stuff...?)
Hark! A Vagrant
Head Doctor Productions
Hollow Mountain
IDK Comics
Inscribing Ardi
The Intrepid Girlbot
JBabb Comics
The Last Halloween
Last Train to Old Town

Legend of Bill
Living With Insanity (some nudity)
Love Me Nice
Married to the Sea
Meaty Yogurt
Medium Large
The Meek
The Moon Prince
Moon Town
Moth (Some nudity)
Mr. Lovenstein
Muddlers Beat

Natalie Dee
The Non-Adventures of Wonderella
Out There
Owen's Uncles
Phuzzy Comics
P.I. Jane
Political Cartoonists Index
Poorly Drawn Lines
The Property of Hate
Red Meat
Rice Boy
Robbie and Bobby
Rosscott, Inc.
Safely Endangered
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Savage Chickens
Scenes from a Multiverse
The Secret Knots
Serenity Rose
Stand Still. Stay Silent
Stinking Hellebore
Strong Female Protagonist
The Super Fogeys
Tales of Pylea
Three Word Phrase (some nudity)
Tiny Kitten Teeth
Toothpaste for Dinner
Trying Human (Some nudity)
Two Guys and Guy

Yellow Peril (PG-13)

Infrequently/No Longer Updating Web Comics
The Abominable Charles Christopher
The Adventures of Dr. McNinja
The Adventures of Ellie Connelly
American Hell
Bag of Toast
Bear in Mind
The Book of Biff
Chain Bear (Some explicit stuff)
Daisy is Dead
Dream Life
Edmund Finney's Quest to Find the Meaning of Life
A Fine Example
Finn and Charlie are HITCHED

Green Wake
Gun Show
Hello with Cheese
Helpful Figures
Kyle & Atticus
The League of Evil Genius
Lesbian Pirates from Outer Space
Letters to a Wild Boar
Lovecraft is Missing

Meat and Plastic
Minimalism Sucks
The Nerds of Paradise
No Reason Comics
One Swoop Fell
Pictures for Sad Children
Raymondo Person
A Redtail's Dream

Roy's Boys (PG 13?)
Run Freak Run
Saint's Way
Sin Titulo
Split Lip
Spooky Doofus
Super Buzzkill
The Super Gay Adventures of Ross Boston
Ugly Girl
2815 Monument

Pure Flash Awesomeness
Angry Alien
Die Anstalt : Toy Psychiatry
The Frown

Clients from Hell
Brian Despain
Creatures in My Head
Damn You Auto Correct!
Jhonen Vasquez's site
Overheard in New York
Passive Aggressive Notes
Looky here
free counters
The powerless and controlled
Monday, March 5, 2018
"Pap Smear" by Crystal Castles.

Repeat every word that you say to me
They put you to use or put you to sleep
I can't tell you the difference between
An embryo or a planted seed

So many shades of white
So many shades of pale
I know what you hate
So I do it constantly

So many shades of white
So many shades of pale
I know how to cut
A wound that will not heal


I was reading about Alice Glass's experiences of abuse at the hands of Ethan Kath today. It's horrible and painful to think of her going through that for so long, especially since it apparently started when she was just a teenager. I wonder how much she even knew herself without him and Crystal Castles, after awhile. How do you know who you are when someone else dominates your life for so long?


Did two gym classes in a row today, rather than just the usual one. I've been doing Turbo Kick with weighted gloves for a few weeks now and the gloves no longer feel heavy to me, so I figured it was time to kick it up a notch and took a strength class right after Turbo Kick. It felt so difficult. T_T My body is weak and sad now from not going to the gym enough. I know 16 hours a week like a couple years ago would probably be excessive, but 3 hours a week doesn't feel like enough. Tomorrow I'm going to try to take another couple classes, and they just added a new Pilates class on Saturdays, so I'll go to that as well. Should be 5 hours a week with those, and once my Thursday morning class ends this week, I'll be free to do something then too. Maybe 6 hours a week? That would be more acceptable. I could feel like I was getting my money's worth from my gym membership (cost would be ~$1 per class if I went to 6 a week consistently).


One of my professors lent me The Unsayable: The Hidden Language of Trauma by Annie G. Rogers about three weeks ago. I finished it last night, and I am contemplating buying a copy for myself. It is an emotionally heavy book, with some pretty disturbing stories of abuse in it. It's also been intellectually hard for me to grasp on some levels, which I'm not used to. At my last grad school I felt constantly frustrated because the concepts I was supposed to be learning seemed like they would be easy enough to grasp if I weren't dissociating all the time and having physical/mental health problems. This... doesn't feel like that. This feels like an alien world I don't know how to make sense of. I learn by connecting new material to what I already know, and I have no idea how to fit these ideas into my existing knowledge base. I want to return the book to my professor but I want to reread it as well so that I can try to understand it. Maybe reading some of the author's other books will help... She has one called
Incandescent Alphabets: Psychosis and the Enigma of Language
that I've been eyeing...

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